Do You Truly Wish to Know – B. Schroeder

Do you truly wish to know?

I must admit, I’m salivating at the prospect. I’ve held it for so long… But of course, ceremony behooves and beholdens me, just as it would you if you knew. There are protocols that must be adhered to.

I must assure you understand that you are not the first to seek it, nor the last. There is little special about you in that respect. Many believe they wish to know until they do. As with all truths though, you cannot know what you do not know, and once you do, you cannot un-know it.

Until you find someone like you of course.

I’m sure you’re aware that I cannot tell you what it is. I can tell you what it is not. It is not peace. That much is certain. It is not joy, or happiness, or fullness. But it is not nothing. No, it is not. It’s not home, nor alien, not warmth nor cold. It is not everything.

It came to me from someone like you. They kept to the rules as I do today, though they had that look in their eye too. The reverse of it. A mirror image of desire. Do mine look like that to you?

They knew then, as I know now and as I may not soon. They knew what awaited me, as they imagined what awaited them. Just as I know and you imagine now.

That’s good. You should imagine. Spread your mind’s wings wide, for you may never again soar so far or so high. You may dream, but imagination is for those who do not yet know, or once did and now do not.

For so long, a dream for me was a poor soul. Someone who I could trick or take or fool. But that was folly. I could do little of that to you. You came to it because it is in you already. You were called to it. As I was. As we all must be.

For how can anyone wish to know otherwise? Knowing is knowing and blissfully soon, I may not.

So, as I take this very breath and prostrate myself before you, I ask again for one final time.

Do you truly wish to know?

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