You take time out of each and every one of your days to stare at a laptop and type at some keys for about an hour. Your eyes probably grow sore with all the radiation you’re taking in from the monitor and your fingers probably ache to all hell. Your head is also spinning with a stream of ideas that you discard, reevaluate, discard, and reevaluate as an endless cycle. Most people would have just given up on your hobby. But here you are.
Years later you’re still typing away like it’s nobody’s business. You know that this an industry that’s nigh impossible to break into, but you don’t care. You know that by the time you finish that manuscript of yours, you’ll probably be turned down by countless people, but you still don’t care. The only friends with similar interests to you that you’ve been able to find are on the internet, and they’re also in that same stressful situation as you. All the people that surround you on a daily basis inquire to no end on when they’ll get the chance to read your work, yet you know that most of them would never bother. But you still keep writing.
You wake up everyday, afraid that it’s going to be one of those days that you hate what you’ve been working on. And then it turns out to be the just that day.
But you still keep writing.
Your typing slows down, you hate your characters, you hate your story, you hate everything you’ve written, you’re about to give up on your dreams! But the sound of typing has yet to stop, and you don’t why, but your fingers just keep moving on their own. You’ll pollute your mind with self-loathing if you don’t write at least 2,000 words on any given day. You’ll bash your head against the tiles of your bathroom floor for not having written more than your minimum amount when you have hours of free time. And the times you feel like writing most are the days that you can barely afford to sit down and open your laptop. But you still keep writing.
Everyone tells you that if you work hard enough, you’ll be able to make this your dream job. People fill your mind with wild flights of fancy, telling you how talented you have the potential to be! Yet none of them bother to read your work. But you still keep writing.
There are days were you wish you’d never chosen to become a novelist! Days were you hate that very craft you’ve poured your soul into honing! Days that every word that you put down on screen is meaningless drivel, days were your story is uncannily similar to those of the past, days were you use cliches and mock yourself for it, days were you can barely manage to make 500 words! But, somehow, you keep writing.
Then you wake up on the next day, relaxed after all that you’ve gone through. You look out the window and see that no one is out on the streets that day. That old lady that insists on screaming at her sons to leave her house is sleeping, that man that seems to mow his lawn every single day decided to leave the neighborhood, and there are no Jehovah’s Witnesses knocking at your door. You glance at the computer on your desk, you sigh and boot it up. When you click on your word processing software, a realization dawns upon you.
You will always keep writing.